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Why I’m Delaying Motherhood Now More Than Ever


Dreams of chocolate babies with big eyes, full lips, and bright smiles flood my consciousness whenever motherhood comes to my mind. I see the promises of ’90s Black sitcoms, of beautiful Black families going through experiences of daily life as a team. But the reality of the present is much more discouraging and sobering.

When the decision to have children occurs in a Black family, thoughts of loss and death at the hands of the state often pervade their reality. For people who are faced with image after image of Black bodies brutalized by those sworn to protect them, it is not simply a question of “Do we want to have children?” It is the realization that these youngins will have to grow up too soon and fear for their lives in a world that is clearly anti-Black.

For me, motherhood is not on the horizon right now.

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